Huffington Post — Russell Bishop's Blog

Surely you have had someone give you a half-hearted apology that left you feeling cold inside. In fact, haven't you been the one giving that "I'm-kind-of-sort-of-sorry" apology yourself?
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But how do you move from resentment, upset and blame into acceptance, understanding and true forgiveness? The answer lies in forgiving yourself. Not forgiving yourself for an action, thought, word or deed aimed at another, but forgiving yourself for having judged yourself in the first place.
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Are you slowly dying in your own self-made poisonous rut of upset and resentment and calling it life instead? Are you drinking the poison of continuous upset hoping the other person will change?
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How much upset have you experienced in your life so far? How much more upset would you like to endure going forward? Bizarre questions, perhaps, and yet if you are willing to dig into them a bit, you might be able to dig out from under all that hurt and upset in your life.
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Taking that first step is what allows the miracle to kick in -- the more steps you take, the closer you get to your impossible good coming true. And the closer you get, the more choices you are likely to discover.
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How can you discover opportunity or an unseen blessing when life presents you with what may seem like an unwelcome event?
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While I haven't always found that window when the door closed in the past, some part of me has clung to that belief over the years. In my recent experience, I have discovered that it just isn't true: He doesn't merely open a window, He actually opens a universe.
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Ever wonder why those New Year's resolutions don't ever seem to work out? If you want things to be different this time around, what you really need to do is ask yourself a few more questions rather than seeking a few more goals.
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The absence of peace can be experienced in any number of ways ranging from stress, anxiety and disturbance to upset, anger and hostility. Sure, there are all kinds of disruptive events in life, and yet some manage to walk through the disturbances relatively unperturbed, while others are much more agitated.
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Ask anyone who has overcome tragedy of one kind or another and you will discover that the difference between those who languish in what has befallen then and those who have made lemons out their lemonade comes down to holding a positive focus and then doing the best with what you have left.
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The idea has been around us forever, perhaps most simply and elegantly stated by George Bernard Shaw and then paraphrased by Robert Kennedy: "Some people see things as they are and say why? I dream things that never were and say, why not?"
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Whenever I pause and connect to the part of me that truly cares, I usually find that I can share criticism in a way that allows the caring to come through.
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No matter what befalls you, you still have choices about how you respond. As you choose your response, you create your experience.
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If you choose to focus primarily on the external, on what happens to you, then you may well wind up settling for the life that shows up. If you listen more intently to your Soul-Talk, then you will find that you can create more of the life experience you would prefer.
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The choice is always yours -- you can keep listening to the Self-Talk cautioning you against pursuing what matters most or you can listen to your Soul-Talk reminding that you already possess that which you seek.
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